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How Not to Be a Desperate Housewife

By Debbie Mandel


T
he new popular ABC comedy-drama with a hint of the Twilight Zone, Desperate Housewives, takes the viewer on a weekly tour of an affluent neighborhood inhabited by women living lives of quiet desperation, and their men don’t look too happy either! Its popularity can mean only one thing: Many of us identify with the theme.

Desperate Housewives presents some obvious reasons for all the unhappiness and we all met them in Stepford Wives. Affluence and love affairs do not appear to offer any solutions. Tidy, organized homes don’t. Raising high spirited children doesn’t seem appealing. While either laughing at some of the absurd antics that have a dark undertone, or feeling sad that the narrative perspective is given by a likable and intelligent woman who shot herself in the head, Desperate Housewives triggers a personal reckoning: “Is this all there is?”

If you are looking for the essentials of happiness, to feel more positive and energetic, so that you don’t live a life of quiet desperation, here are some suggestions:
  • Activate your creativity. Tap into your potential. Be alert to the signals and the dreams. All the passions that live beneath the surface of your skin need to see the light of day. Creativity will revitalize you and fill the ache in your heart. You will recognize that you are being creative when you feel alive with energy. You will not even sense the hours pass as you immerse yourself in creative expression. Take a risk, seek your inspiration and try to tie your work into service for others.
  • Recharge your sexual energy. Many of us suppress our life force because it has frightened others who seek to cloak it, beat it to submission, or burn it at the stake. Allow yourself to feel. Develop an awareness of your five senses. Open yourself up to nature and to feeling your body. So many of us live in our heads instead of our hearts. Close your eyes and breathe deeply. With each breath relax your heart. See your own golden energy revitalize your heart. Walk with your shoulders back to open your heart.
  • Trust your intuition. Your body will signal toxic energy with a bad taste, a headache, stomachache, etc. with certain people or locations. On the other hand, other people and spaces will make you feel lighter and healthier. Your body communicates with you all the time. Listen to it.
  • Become a comedy writer for your personal world. Laugh especially during adversity. Laughter is actually a pain killer. View it as a release valve on a boiler about to burst.
  • Express yourself as though everything you do is amazing. Free yourself from the past story and act out anything you wish to create your present story. You can change as often as the present and each endeavor brings you success. Please note that all the people you think are thinking about you, aren’t! Step out of your box.
  • Make your health regimen one of living: eat living foods (raw fruits and vegetables); exercise to tune up your body - walking outside in the sunshine generates synergistic energy; sleep at night to heal and regenerate daytime stressors.


Debbie Mandel, MA is the author of Turn On Your Inner Light: Fitness for Body, Mind and Soul, a stress-reduction specialist, motivational speaker, a personal trainer and mind/body lecturer. She is the host of the weekly Turn On Your Inner Light Show on WGBB 1240AM in New York City , produces a weekly wellness newsletter, and has been featured on radio/ TV and print media. To learn more visit: www.turnonyourinnerlight.com